A Summary of Ancient Irken History
by AxMxK
Summary: What was the Irken race before Zim, before even the days of the Empire? I have put a great deal of thought into this and have pieced together my own version of Irken History. Any ideas and contributions would be appreciated. I might expand this.
1. Ancient History Summarized

Ancient Irken History (as theorized by AMK)

=Intro=

Even long before becoming a space faring race, Irkens respected height as the greatest measurement of superiority (it is possible that the taller an Irken was, the closer they were to the stars). Consequently, ancient Irken society consisted of squabbling clans that fought over the planet, with each clan being led by a Tallest Chieftain that each claimed themselves to be the Tallest one on the planet. Irkens, volatile, arrogant, and ambitious as they characteristically were, could not even agree on a name for their planet or for their race. The constant warfare between the clans over territory, resources and land (plateaus, mountains and other high land was especially fought over) shaped the Irken race into one that specialized in war. For the greater part of their pre-interstellar history, Irken society remained in this feudal system until the coming of Tallest Irk.

== The Irk Clan ==

Tallest Irk was by far the most insane, as well as tallest, Tallest on the planet. He also was an Irken who did not sleep, which was truly a unique feature. However the other Tallest largely regarded him as an inane idiot and thus disregarded his megalomaniac claims of superiority and height. As mentally damaged as he was, Tallest Irk believed that his people were destined to become masters of the universe (Irken technology at this point had reached about the same level as our own today, and Irkens had become aware of the cosmos beyond their planet), and fervently held to the ideals that he believed would lead his people to greatness. As such, Tallest Irk began his campaign to unite the clans of the planet, whether by diplomacy or preferably force. The other Tallest and their clans chose to fight.

== PAK ==

As the war dragged on over a century, there seemed to be no end in sight. It wasn't until Tallest Irk's greatest scientist invented the Pak, that Irken society would change forever. Irkens, ever since their emergence in cybernetic technology, made frequent use of cybernetic implants and modifications in the eternal pursuit of superiority over their peers. Pak, lead scientist of the Irk Clan, had invented a powerful multi-purpose implant and device which utilized the most state of the art technology. The PAK, as it was subsequently named, was meant to provide the host a multitude of useful and revolutionary capabilities, including atmospheric processing that allowed the host to breath nearly any air, and charging cells that, if regularly recharged and maintained, could keep the host awake indefinitely, essentially eliminating any need for sleep as well as extending the host lifespan for many many years. However, the PAK could only be properly utilized by bonding with the host, attaching to the spinal column and essentially gaining control of the Squeedly Spooch and thus the host would become dependent on the PAK, and to properly bond the attachment and activation of the PAK must occur during birth. But when properly attached, information could actually be inputted immediately after birth, thus every smeet born with a PAK would have a predetermined essential rudimentary knowledge, and loyalty to the clan. According to Pak, the PAK would make Irkens "500% greater." Convinced, Tallest Irk thus decreed that every new child of his clan would be fitted with a PAK, in an effort to make his clan and its warriors the most superior on the planet, thus swinging the war in his favor. It soon became clear however, that not all were genetically compatible with the PAK, and many newborns died as their bodies rejected the device. Even with many tried configurations in the PAK design, compatibility issues persisted, and PAK seemed to be a doomed project.

== Smeet Revolution ==

Tallest Irk believed the PAK was not the problem, it was his people's "messy and mixed up genes". He then decreed a new project to begin, one that would investigate genetic engineering as a possible solution to the compatibility problems of the PAK. This project, supervised and led by Scientist Pak, was the first of its kind in history, as most Irkens believed their superior genes to be "unimprovable." After much experimentation, the project's reached its greatest achievement. Pak and his team was successful in the artificial gestation and birthing of an entire column of gene customized smeets, utilizing donated sex cells and incubation tube-capsules rather than traditional Irken eggshells. Each and every smeet produced at this experimental birthing facility successfully bonded to their PAKs with few complications that were ironed out in the coming ages. Historians regard this column to be the very first true born Irkens of the current age. Declaring the project a success, Tallest Irk gave Pak 11 medals (one for every smeet birthed at the facility and one for inventing the PAK in the first place) and immediately made the birthing facilities the mandatory method of birthing for his entire clan. Consequently the traditional method of reproduction, sex and egg hatching, was rendered obsolete among the clan, and soon Irken gender would only be distinguished by different hormone production and the production of sex cells by internal primary sex organs; all external gender specific features except antennae shape eventually faded with each generation.

== Unity ==

Realizing that he could birth as many PAK equipped soldiers as he needed, Tallest Irk prepared legions of superior soldiers. With his superior numbers and superior followers, Tallest Irk subdued and conquered the other clans within a decade. Within another decade, all of the planet's population was united under Irk's banner; all wore PAKs, and all were now born in a capsule-tube birthing facilities. Tallest Irk, megalomaniac as he was, decided to name the whole planet he now controlled, Irk. His people subsequently took on the name Irkens, and Irk himself took on the the name ''Almighty Tallest Irk'', "to avoid confusion between him and the planet he controlled," he said, and the dark ages of Irken history were officially over.

== The Last Decree ==

While all of Irk wore PAKs, Almighty Tallest Irk himself, could not. Having been too old for the bonding process at the time of the PAK's invention, Tallest Irk neared the end of his life as he lacked the longevity the PAK provided most Irkens. At age 100 (in Irken years) Almighty Tallest Irk passed away, blathering inanities on his death bed, insane until the end. His last decree, however, was quite clear, and Scientist Pak, his most trusted Irken, ensured it was carried out. Tallest Irk, having lived a life of war and death of his fellow Irkens, decreed that all PAKs of Irken-kind to be inputted with one unbreakable, inerasable law that all Irkens would subsequently unconsciously follow: "No Irken may knowingly kill a fellow Irken." (A/N: This explains why the Tallest simply didn't execute Zim after Operation Impending Doom I, they could not).

== The Control Brains ==

As the first and greatest leader of Irk passed away, Irk was overpopulated as a sprawling metropolis of purple skylines, with a population nearing a trillion. While the Tallest were programmed and bred to be natural leaders, they still would need the assistance of other Irkens to administrate the divisions of Irken life. However, tall Irkens who were not so competent in leadership were still being put in important positions, merely due to their height. Also, Irkens were still ambitious, volatile creatures, so squabbling about who was taller, was common. Consequently, the government was choked in incompetence and bureaucratic inefficiency.

It was eventually decided by Almighty Tallest Green that there must be something done about this. After consultation with his scientists, the idea of putting together the information from the PAKs of deceased Irkens was arrived upon. The first Control Brain was essentially a very large PAK without the practicalities; it was a compilation of all data of all deceased PAK wearing Irkens. As such, the Control Brain also contained the genetic code of all these Irkens. The Control Brain, now sentient and aware of its purpose, was put in control of the genetic coding of the Irken birthing facilities by Tallest Green and his science corps. This first Control Brain then decided that each Irken, before the gestation process, would have predetermined a role in the Irken society, and the smeet's genetic code would be a result of Genetic Shuffling, a mixture of the genetic coding of various deceased Irkens who had played a similar role that the new smeet was destined to fill. Essentially, each and every Irken "inherited" the genetics to suit their role in society. While the system was not perfect, the Control Brain's new system worked, and with the reigns of the subsequent Tallest, the Control Brain of Irk was expanded in power and soon took over more and more administrative duties of Irken society that required emotionless non bias, including military training selection, judicial trials, and utilities. The Control Brain of Irk now essentially oversaw and supervised all Irken activity, but the Tallest were still Almighty. The Control Brain system would eventually be utilized on every planet of the Irken Empire, with a Control Brain for every planet.


	2. Side Note

_A/N:_ _Hope you enjoyed ancient pre-empire Irken history. I might write more on the topic of Irken history, but for now I'm just sorta... of a reader when it comes to fanfiction. I'm more attached to my drawing (.com). Also this chapter is sort of a side note that is my own little theoretical possibility about someone we are very familiar with._

== Side Note: The Prophecy of Irk ==

Irkens, as a species, were never the superstitious bunch (aside from their belief in height being the ultimate measurement of superiority). There is, however, a legend that has been told among the Irkens for generations, despite it having been marked obsolete by the Control Brains and being deleted every time it is encountered in an Irken PAK. It is even rare for a Tallest to know of the Prophecy of Irk.

It was during the reign of Almighty Tallest Green, and the construction of the first Control Brain of Irk that a file was found in the Control Brain's database. The file was unable to be attributed to any source, and it was dubbed by the science corps as an erroneous by-product of PAK compilation before being set aside.

The file was merely labeled "IRK" and was found to be quite corrupt and broken after later examination by scientists in their free time. The file somehow made its way into the deep recesses of the Irken information net, and found itself in the hands of various unsuspecting Irkens who came across this file. It became somewhat of a hobby for Irkens with free time (of which there were few, most Irkens were always on duty serving their people) to piece the file together bit by bit, and for this reason the file was shared and continued to traverse the net for many generations. None could fully restore the file (those that might have had the professional skill to do so were too professional to deal with such trivial pastimes), and only a few could make sense of what they could piece together. Thus the Prophecy of Irk was born.

According to what could be gleamed from the file, Almighty Tallest Irk would one day return, or rather, reincarnated as another Irken which would possess the genes of his "almighty mind and of his almighty greatness" (as translated from the file). This idea has been marked by many as absurd, as all knew that Almighty Tallest Irk died long before the coming of the Control Brains (which now controlled the gene shuffling for the birthing process, see The Control Brains) and did not even ever wear a PAK (see The Last Decree) and thus could not have had his genes inputted into the Irken gene collective. It was for this illogical concept that the Control Brains deleted the file as "obsolete" whenever coming across it. For some Irkens, however, it was not a far fetched idea. It was theorized that with the right random combination of genes, an Irken could be born with the genes that would happen to match Irk's Almighty Greatness. Thus, his reincarnation would not be left up to the Control Brains, but up to fate itself. Those very few Irkens who were willing to believe the prophecy to such an extent ensured its survival by telling it to whomever they could. To the believers, Almighty Irk would return, and the Reborn would be just as maniacal and destructive just as Irk was, and would lead his followers to rule the universe, just as Irk did with his home world.

_A/N: Oh Snap. Whaddya think of that? Do tell me._


	3. First Steps into SPACE!

_A/N: So far, I've written this history as a means to explain three key features of the Irken race that we've seen in the show: the PAKs, the birthing process, and the Control Brains. (btw, the Control Brain you see in "The Fry Cook What Came From All That Space" is the Control Brain of Irk, mentioned in the first chapter, at least, in my mind it is… it makes sense!)._

_But for the sake of exploring more about what I might have to say about Irken history, I am continuing this piece. If not at least to get better at writing._

_Today's lecture is on the Irken's first foray into SPACE!_

**== Irken Gravity ==**

While the Control Brain project was underway, other efforts in managing the huge population of Irkens that flooded the cities of Irk were underway. The relatively new Irken space program saw expansion into the stars as not only the first step in Tallest Irk's dream (see Ancient Irken History), but also as a means to find places to put all these extra Irkens. Efforts to merely leave the atmosphere were initially difficult, as Irk was a large planet with strong gravitational pull. As such, the first experimental launches were mostly failures; early Irken technology was insufficient in developing vessels that were capable of even leaving the ionosphere, let alone achieving stable orbit. It wasn't until the completion of the Control Brain of Irk a decade later that engines powerful enough to escape Irk's gravity were finally developed. Consequently, by the time Irkens achieved space flight capabilities, their engines and ship designs were quite powerful in their own right and in the zero gravity of space, Irken ships moved easily through the cosmos, to the surprised delight of the Irken aerospace program. The first Irken space capable ships, while always equipped with weapons, never found use in actual combat (Irkens were merely ready for war at any time). Instead, the ships were to be utilized in construction.

**== Orbit ==**

While Irken space engineers were successful in launching satellites into Irk's orbit, the first great achievement of the Irken space program was the successful in-orbit construction of Irk's first orbital space station, _The Immense_. After being linked Irk's Control Brain via satellites, _The Immense_ served as the Irken's new space command, and was constantly added on to; it was the Irken's first step into dominance of the cosmos. From _The Immense_, the Irken space program was able to quickly organize colonization efforts of Irk's multiple moons (how many moons there were is left to speculation). Within a decade, stable and fortified colonies were established on all the moons of Irk, and with these expansions the Irken Empire was born.

_A/N: This probably isn't one of the best things I've written… ah well… I dunno. If I come up with better ideas on this step in Irken history, I'll change this. I also think this was kinda short, but then again, it's just about how the Irkens got into space._

_Critique, if you please. Ideas for what the next chapter should cover would be appreciated as well. I adore!_


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